Tuesday, November 29, 2022

Sensory Overload or Company Holiday Parties

This weekend in addition to a major assignment, there was also the company Holiday party. 

No big deal right? The plan was to go, have some dinner with the people I work with, and come back home and continue my assignment.

Which is more or less what happened. I planned the night, have a drink at the bar, a glass of wine with dinner, socialize a bit and go home. I had maybe 3 drinks over the period of 4 hours... I should have drank more... 

We arrived at the location for the party, and there were probably 5 other companies that were having their festivities in the same place. When we descended the stairs at what was essentially a convention center style part of the hotel, we were hit with a wall of noise. 

I went into IMMEDIATE sensory overload. I wanted to RUN back to the car and go home, order a pizza and put on my pyjamas and enjoy the peace and quiet of my home. 

In the before times (before COVID) I went out and socialized, but I drank a lot. But I socialized with people. Since the pandemic I have stopped drinking (as much) and I have more sensory issues with loud noises, and crowds. I'd like to blame COVID for everything - but alas this has always been an issue for me. My sister suggested that I get earplugs that dull the background noise like she bought for the littlest nephew (grandson) - guess where those were? AT HOME! The last time I used them was at the baseball stadium. I regret my decision to leave the house.

Needless to say I was not drunk or hungover after the party - I am however emotionally drained. I am not sure how long this will last but all I want to do is cuddle my dogs and husband and stay REALLY quiet.

At least there are no "Daemonyka Stories" of getting too drunk and doing something stupid (when I was in my twenties at a holiday party I got so drunk I changed clothes with one of the guys on my team in the bathroom) - but I did feel the need to apologize on Monday for being quiet/weird.

This summarizes it nicely:

Sunday, November 27, 2022

I Miss You

More substantial post tomorrow- assignment done for class. Miss my baby girl and boo boo (translation my dogs Buffy and Spike) I’d like to think they are watching over me and taking care of Mom.

Tuesday, November 22, 2022

Dear Mom


Dear Mom,

We missed you this weekend. It was J’s birthday party (littlest grandson), and everyone was there. The first time we had seen everyone since the pandemic. You know all of the extended family… I missed you. I know Steve missed you. It was weird.

I got an A+ on my last course at school. I cried. I wanted to call you and tell you how well I was doing, and that you inspire me to keep going even when it’s hard. I called Steve. I cried. He was thrilled for me, and all I could do was think of you.

I’m doing well in my current course, I like the professor and more importantly I’m learning from her. 

It snowed here, and I thought of how you hated winter. It’s cold. I finally get it. Ever since we lost Buffy I have lost the joy of snow. She really loved winter so much, now that she and Spike are gone I have kind of lost that sparkle and love for winter. Willow the princess she is won’t go outside if it’s cold, and Diesey well he takes two steps outside and runs back in. It’s not fun anymore and it’s has only just begun.

I’m not going to decorate for Christmas this year. I know you loved Christmas - and that is kinda why I’m not going to decorate. I have all the ornaments, and decorations… and I don’t want to face you not being here. Also we’re going to NB for the holidays to be with SiL’s family. He hasn’t been home to see family in over 5 years- so it’s time. It doesn’t make sense for us to decorate and then go away and take it down when we get back. 

You are always on my mind Mom, I wish you were here.

Love you muchly


Sunday, October 30, 2022

Sunday Sentiments


I am a relatively quiet person- rather introverted although if you meet me in public you would definitely wonder. Because of this I have a few really good friends, you can count them on one hand, and this week I sent them this along with heartfelt love messages. 

I love my friends and cherish them. After Mom died I have found myself entirely aware of how little time we have and I don’t want to waste a second. I want my friends (and family) to know how much I love them and how important they are in my life.

While I don’t know you all personally- I do want to thank you all for continuing to check in on us over here. Your comments and visits are loved and also cherished!  

My suggestion for the week is to take a moment and tell at least one person that you love them. Go ahead and make it weird. 

Tuesday, October 25, 2022

Happy Birthday Morningstar

 Today would have been Mom’s 72nd Birthday.

Please celebrate as you would see fit, but if you wanted to have Chinese food and vanilla birthday cake in honour of Mom - she would have loved that.

Sunday, October 23, 2022

Sunday Sentiments

 Today I’m finishing up the final assignment for my course.

This is what my girlfriend sent me as motivation.
 I love her so much.

Sensory Overload or Company Holiday Parties

This weekend in addition to a major assignment, there was also the company Holiday party.  No big deal right? The plan was to go, have some ...